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Joke of the Day
"My penis is so big, it goes from A to Z! As long as we're talking about my keyboard."
Next Joke
"Him: Mm girl, back that ass up. Me: Like on iCloud or something?"
"Just once I'd like to wake up as eager to start the day as my p*nis is."
"What did earth say to the other planet? ""You guys have no life!"""
"You'd be surprised how easy it is to pick up girls All it takes is a respectful attitude, a low key vibe, a breezy sense of humour, a nice beard, duct tape, and a baseball bat."
"I want to give my ex a great Valentines present to show him how much I still care. I think I'll go all out and buy him a Toyota."
"My daughter has an ice skating date with her boyfriend tonight. So I'll be the guy skating behind two 12 year olds carrying a shotgun."
"""Baby, I'm gonna make you mine."" - sweet talker forcing someone to be a coal miner"
"""Well, there goes the end of my arm,"" said Tom offhandedly."
"They say if you love something you should let it go, but I don't think this pastrami sandwich will come back to me, so I'm just eating it."