148695

Joke of the Day

"After a dinner party ...while taking plates to the kitchen my guest asked if the dishwasher was dirty. I said no, I believe she showered before dinner."

"Who is this ""one""? And why is he always arguing with people?"

"What do you do when a Chihuahua sneezes? Get a small hankie!"

"I went into a medical shop. ""Have you got anything for irritation?"" ""Yes,"" he said, ""But where exactly?"" I said, ""Fuck knows, you tell me. It's your shop."""

"Q: What illness are you suffering from if you keep seeing cartoon animals who talk? A: Disney spells."

"I wish they made bar-stools with seat belts and dual side airbags."

"News flash: Vandals destroy street signs They pulled out all the stops"

"When someone starts a Facebook post with ""there are no words..."" You better get prepared because you're about to read a lot of words."

"(Generic title that catches your attention) (Mildly amusing pun)"

"I've just found my iPhone autocorrects ""cunt"" to ""Cynthia."" Which means somewhere in Steve Jobs' past is a woman with one HELL of a story."