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Joke of the Day

"The reason I don't like police officers... Everyone that has ever arrested me has been a police officer."

"Did you hear about the jewish guy? Did you hear about the jewish guy that walked into a wall with a boner? He broke his nose."

"I am opening a new restaurant... ...called ""Whatever. I Don't Care"". Gonna make a killing on date night."

"Q: Did you hear about the professor that got in a horrible wreck? A: He was grading papers on a curve."

"What do you call a pop star that marries Rowan Atkinson? Avril Labean"

"What do all 'Tickle Me Elmo' toys receive before leaving the factory? Two test tickles."

"Why is turkey happy? It just escaped from a coop."

"No one will play my mix tape... They say it's a fire hazard."

"Do you ever look at your own ass and ask yourself ""What the hell is going on?"" -- Balaam son of Beor"

"[blind date] So,where you from? [eyes turn black] T h E S E v E n T H C i R C L e O F H e L L Oh nice. ever miss it? [cries blood] Y e s"