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Joke of the Day

"Q: Did you hear about the professor that got in a horrible wreck? A: He was grading papers on a curve."

Next Joke
 
"""Man, I did so much shit today"" *throws away diaper"
"Me: I want to buy this chicken Farmer: Ok. Gonna take him home and eat him? *imagines self fighting crime with new chicken buddy* Me: Yes"
"Knock, Knock..."
"3 days ago I put a sign on my door that said ""I'll be back in 20 minutes"". Nobody has bothered me since and I'm never taking it down."
"Every time you push the potato button on your microwave, a potato appears in someone else's microwave."
"A One Liner Tried to catch some fog yesterday.....but I mist."
"I'm going to write a colorless geometry book. It'll be called ""Fifty Shapes of Grey."""
"Evening commute One inch of snow will do this to you in DC"
"Evil Queen: mirror- Hand Mirror: what Evil Queen: mirror- Hand Mirror: WHAT Evil Queen: on the wall Hand Mirror: oh shit sorry"