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Joke of the Day

"GEORGE WASHINGTON: We should put ""We Trust In God"" on our money THOMAS JEFFERSON: Great idea. Did you get that? YODA (taking notes): Yep"

"I found I out I was concieved at my grandmothers funeral... Appearently, my Mum was trying comfort him. Stupid mourning wood."

"What do you do if a bird shits on your windscreen? Don't take her out again."

"What is the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair"

"Goodnight moon, goodnight stars, goodnight perfectly normal Purple Rain album cover where Prince's eyes follow u across the room"

"I don't know why they are called smart phones, I dropped mine in the toilet and it didn't even try to get out."

"Why buy it for $7 when you can make it yourself with $92 worth of craft supplies."

"what do Chinese people say when it is sunny outside. what do Chinese people say when it is sunny outside i wish it was raining cats and dogs that would be dericious"

"My penis is a gentleman ... It stands up so ladies have a place to sit down."

"Q: Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? A: He wanted to win the no bell prize!"