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Joke of the Day

"Why do chemists go to the gym so much? Before they titrate, they need to get buffer!"

"Bought a blowup doll today but I won't blow her up til tomorrow. Don't want to seem desperate."

"I wonder if Woody or Buzz have ever met Andy's moms toys. I think it would cause mass confusion as they probably share the same names."

"""Yes, I'm still single and underemployed, but at least I'm not MARRYING CHARLES MANSON"" --women at family holiday gatherings from now on"

"Dog The Bounty Hunter's greatest weakness is getting distracted when the fugitive throws a tennis ball."

"Investigators say the Germanwings copilot suffered from manic depression. One minute he was up, then he was down."

"There are 2 kinds of programmers Those who understand pointers and Segmentation fault (core dumped)"

"I think my new neighbor is a rapist, but that's because I say, ""...said the rapist."" after every one of his sentences."

"Why Does Dr. Pepper Come in a Can? ...Because his wife died."

"How do you circumcise a hillbilly? Kick his mother in the jaw."