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Joke of the Day

"My neighbors thought the tombstones in my yard were festive until they saw their pets' names scrawled on them."

"I miss the good old days when no one knew what gluten was."

"What rings twice and screams once? Ray Charles answering the iron"

"If Math was a dick, I'd be gay. Because I suck at it."

"And on Good Friday, I'm once again reminded that I'm a lonely virgin. Even Jesus got nailed today."

"What does a noodle say after praying? Ramen"

"The first self driving commercial cars license plate should be... 'AFKBRB'"

"I need some help with my Halloween costume. I'm dressing up as Ebola and I want to make sure everyone gets it."

"So... what do you call a sexual tree? A pork-u-pine My brain is dumb"

"WTF!!!! My son just called me the N-word!! Neglectful"