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Joke of the Day
"There is a new rapper who is rapping for feminism. People call him feminem"
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"[interview] Any questions? ""Why isn't Bigfoot called Bigfeet?"" No about working here ""Oh! If he worked here would you call him Bigfeet?"""
"How many gnats does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It only takes two, but the trick is getting them in the lightbulb."
"everyday im faced w/ a choice b/w good & evil. i try to be good but why woud i ever choose MIRACLE whip when i can hav a HELL MANS MAYONAISE"
"The FAA can register my drone... ...when they pry it from my neighbour's cold dead head."
"I found a tumor at Bingo last night. It's okay. It was B9."
"Guy stole my bike so I got in a cab & said follow that guy! He said sure, whats his twitter name? We laughed & hi-fived & I need a new bike."
"That's the story about a penguin breathing by his ass One-day he sit and dye"
"Okay, calm down. It's a spider. Just one tiny litt- HOLY MOLY IT MOVED!"
"Birth Control? Don't kid yourself."