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Joke of the Day

"""HULK WANT LOAN."" Bank: ""We can't loan to people like you."" ""GREEN SKIN PEOPLE??"" Bank: ""No, people who owe 2.6M in property damage."""

"what do you call a lady with one leg Ilene sorry if I killed you because of how old this is"

"This may be not be a mainstream opinion, but I don't believe you should cut down a Christmas tree unless you intend on eating it."

"Whats the last thing that went through Sally's mind after jumping from a skyscraper? Her ankles."

"A woman once asked me for 9 inches and said to make it hurt So I fucked her 3 times and punched her in the mouth."

"2 guys walk into a bar.. The third one ducked."

"Remember, Christmas isn't about how big your tree is, or what's under it. It's about who's around it."

"How do you get a redneck to suck your dick? Put Ranch on it..."

"So why is it called the ""funny bone""? BECASE IT'S ATTACHED TO YOUR HUMERUS"

"Glad the NBA lockout is over. That was like the worst thing that happened to black people, ever."