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Joke of the Day
"God gave you alcohol, sex and music. Why do you all talk about politics?!"
Next Joke
"My friends and I got so high in Amsterdam that we went to a local store and stole a couple of bags of ice.... We took them down to the canal and released them back into the wild."
"A man's girlfriend shaves her pussy in the shower. His girlfriend says ""Hey babe, I shaved my pussy...you know what that means?"" The man replies ""Yeah, the fucking drain is clogged again."""
"One man went to Reddit assuming it as a hotel One man went to reddit assuming it as a hotel and asked: what to eat ? Admin Replayed: Subreddit and guidelines Man: Give me one plate each HA Ha Ha"
"""How is this grilling you?"" - mom's 44th question"
"3 days before Christmas, my wife drops her 2007-era iPhone in a public toilet. I get the hint. She wants me to get her a much cheaper phone."
"""Why are you always tired, Dad?"" my 3-year-old asked as she woke me from a nap by poking me in the eye."
"Tonight's Democratic debate"
"Breast Inplants They such a silly-con"
"On his deathbed, a man is asked if he wants anything said at his funeral. ""Oh look, he's moving."""