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Joke of the Day

"I asked my Dad for help with course selection... My last block was either Psychology or Computer Applications. So I asked, ""Which do you think I should take?"" ""Whichever you'll excel in, son."""

"I removed Sean Connery's limbs & replaced them with Daniel Craig's arms & Pierce Brosnan's legs. They formed an unlikely Bond."

"electricity is from electrons... morality from morons?"

"Why did the crayon want to be a phone? Because it wanted to be a texta."

"Why do German shower-heads have 11 holes? because Jews only have 10 fingers."

"A man was masturbating for 48 days straight until finally he blew his load It was a long time coming."

"Heard that the Lord Of The Rings author had a bit of a stammer. I tried to get his attention this one time and he said, ""Jay, are are you Tolkein to me?"""

"Girls call me ugly until they find out how much money I have Then they call me ugly and poor"

"I don't really like ""your mum"" jokes because they're a lot like your mum. They're really easy to do."

"Why do they have fences around cemetaries? Because people are dying to get in."