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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a kleptomaniac who doesn't understand figurative speech? Someone who takes everything literally"

"What do you call a fashionable Japanese warrior? Glamurai"

"Sex is like maths.. Add the bed Subtract the clothes Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply"

"As a 37 year old man, I feel like I should know how to spell Febuary."

"What does CNN call back-to-back aviation disasters? Christmas in July"

"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that."

"""i'd do anthony for you"" - worst autocorrect fail by me"

"Once you stop doing functional programming... You never return"

"What's another name for a dinosaur? A thesaurus."

"Why'd the ISIS fighter bring his son to the execution? Like all fathers, he wanted his son to get ahead."