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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I have my shit together, sometimes I eat an unidentified white substance out of my hair and am grateful when it's frosting."

"Why did the sperm cross the road? I wore the wrong socks."

"How many chocolate bunnies can you put into an empty Easter basket? One. After that the basket won't be empty."

"What's the difference between a vitamin and a hormone? You can't make a vita-min. But you can make a hor-mone!"

"What do you call a police officer that deals in sibling rape An Incestigator"

"What were the headlines like when the shovel was invented? There's been a ground breaking discovery..."

"Why can't you lift weights on Monday? It's a week day."

"How does an Irishman's future look like? Very blight."

"What do you call a homeless Hitler? A roofless dictator."

"How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead"