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Joke of the Day
"Why is lettuce my favorite vegetable? Just cos."
Next Joke
"What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.!"
"Went to Lowes for a new dishwasher pretty stoked that she has a job too."
"Amazon review: Amazon river DO NOT GO HERE! Everything tries to kill you, plus they don't even have free shipping."
"What did the duck say when she bought lipstick? Just put it on my bill."
"I almost accused a 10 yr old of stealing my dance moves but it turns out he just really had to go to the bathroom & didn't know where it was"
"How I fall asleep People get jealous of me because of how fast I fall asleep so I'm going to share my secret. First of all, ally you have to do is close your ey..."
"I was going to make an anal joke... Butt fuck it!"
"Facebook: Hey remember this pic of your dog that died? Me: Damnit Facebook not now. FB: Sorry... FB: Your ex girlfriend is getting married."
"[drinks milk from carton] WHY AREN'T YOU USING A GLASS?!? ""I went to the eye doctor"" What does that mean? ""He said I don't need glasses"""