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Joke of the Day

"School report My hot history teacher told me I have to give her a one on one report on 'deep throat'. Long story short I got expelled and btw what the fuck is 'watergate'?!?!?!"

"Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The ""p"" is silent."

"What is a KKK member's favorite board game? CROSS fire"

"How do most women like their eggs? Ovarie-z"

"So a chick is talking with a puppy ""My mom is the nicest mom ever and keeps me warm"" the chick says. The puppy frowns and says, ""my mom's a bitch."""

"Barack Obama has a long one, George Bush has a short one, Lorde doesn't have one and Pope Francis doesn't use his... Last names. What were you expecting?"

"What do you call a gay paraplegic? Rolaids."

"I follow back all spambots. I even star some of their tweets, because I'm looking for a spot in middle management when the robots take over."

"DOG BOSS: ur fired ME: wait, is there any way you'll reconsider? DOG BOSS: no ME: u want to go for a ride in the car DOG BOSS: *tilts head*"

"Ford cars and anal.. If you replace ford with anal you will get some interesting results. Anal Explorer Anal Fiesta Anal Focus Anal Flex Anal Fusion"