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Joke of the Day

"two fish swim into a concrete wall one turn to the other and says:""Dam"""

"Two condoms walk past a gay bar. Two condoms walk past a gay bar, one turns to the other and says, ""Hey, wanna go get...shitfaced?"""

"What did the rock say when he had to leave his girlfriend for a long time? I pumice I'll come back soon!"

"I saw a Chinese baby and a black kid wave at each other this morning. Gives me hope for the future. Or at least another Rush Hour movie"

"1.Not leaving my room 2.Not leaving the house 3.Missing someone's birthday party My childhood punishments have become my adult hobbies."

"*as girl walks in* 98, 99, *grunts* 100 ""Wow, push-ups?"" Uhm, no? Just learning to count."

"I fell and hit my head on my drum set today... Me: Dad, I think I have a concussion Dad: No son, you have a PER-cussion"

"Did you hear about the logical skunk? It made sense."

"What do Eskimos and Tupperware have in common? They both like a tight seal!"

"I'm sick of people blaming the Internet when someone gets killed. Watch the History Channel. Hitler didn't find the Jews on craigslist."