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Joke of the Day

"Playing that 'Y'ALL READY FOR THIS?' song on your iPhone, full blast while entering a public toilet stall, feels pretty good."

"Just been to the shop and swapped 50 raisins for 100 sultanas. I can't believe the currant exchange rate"

"I was just wondering, if you're not too busy sometime, maybe I could pet your dog"

"Cashier: ""Look at all this candy! You're going to have a lot of happy kids this Halloween"" Me: ""It's Halloween?"""

"if one member of the motorcycle gang has to pee do they all stop or does he just have to catch back up?"

"Me: Don't be mean to my friend. Her: Your friend just broke in my door and almost strangled me. Me: I said he was my friend, not yours."

"He died doing two things he loved: making a toast sandwich and taking a bath"

"What game do old black people play? Blingo!"

"My friend David lost his I.D. Now we just call him Dave."

"Business idea: Own a profitable business"