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Joke of the Day

"Statistically speaking 5 out of 6 people are pro gang rape."

"George Bush was trying out BDSM with his wife. George: Punish me baby, I've been a bad boy. Laura: Hmmm...what did you do honey? George: 9/11"

"I only have eyes for you. We sold out of skin swaths & teeth a couple hours ago. Last few eyes are in that bucket. (50% off bruised ones.)"

"I use a sword to argue with people. They usually get my point."

"What does the twitter bird drink? Twater!"

"A pregnant teen and her baby is thinking the same thing... ""My mom is gonna kill me."""

"Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up."

"When you say the word poop, your mouth does the same motion as your butt hole. Same can be said for the phrase ""explosive diarrhea""."

"There are two varieties of hoe. One is a gardening tool. The other is a hardening tool."

"A 'Jim's Dozen' is 11, because I take one for myself."