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Joke of the Day

"Psycho ward break They were all apprehended quiet fast. Seems they were all logged on Reddit at the same time."

"My girlfriend called me lazy the other day. I almost responded."

"What did 50 cent's grandma say to him when he gave her a hand woven scarf for mother's day? G u knit?"

"What does Rolf Harris like to play with on the piano? A minor."

"Interviewer: what's your biggest weakness? Me: ha nice try I: excuse me? M: that's how Lex Luthor beat Superman. I'm not stupid."

"I'm going to keep using 'penis' as a verb until someone lets me penis them."

"What did the man say who couldn't add the same number to itself? I can't even..."

"Man to wife: Business is bad, if YOU learn TO cook we can remove servant. Wife: If YOU learn how to fuck we can remove driver, gardener & watchman..."

"""Feeling sad? We can help make it worse"" - online dating"

"Apparently ""cheesecake & tacos"" wasn't the answer the interviewer was looking for when he asked me what my weaknesses are."