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Joke of the Day

"Psycho ward break They were all apprehended quiet fast. Seems they were all logged on Reddit at the same time."

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"If you come up to my bedroom door and find a sock on the knob it means I'm having sex ... Probably with the other sock."
"What do you call an earthquake in NYC? Harlem Shake."
"Bill Joe Armstrong (From Greenday) was walking down the street. A girl walked past him and said ""Wow, you smell amazing."" He replied: ""That's because I wore cologne, I wore cologne."""
"How does a Range Rover Evoque look after landing on it's roof? Exactly the same."
"Every chef on Chopped's like ""I was medically dead for 3 yrs & my wife married the guy who pushed me off that bridge. My specialty is bao."""
"If you stand for nothing you'll fall for anyone who offers you a chair because standing is fucking exhausting."
"What is the new LGBT flavor enhancer for cunnilingus? (wait for it ... wait for it ...) creme brulee"
"When I said that I wanted to be a comedian, everyone laughed Well, now I'm here, and no one is laughing."
"My girlfriend is really loud during sex. I don't know why, she knows nobody is coming to help her."