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Joke of the Day

"How many Vegans does it take to eat a cheeseburger? Only one... if no one is looking!"

"Did you hear about the antelope... Did you hear about the antelope that was trampled by a herd of elephants while getting dressed? He was a self dressed stamped antelope."

"Did you hear about the undertaker who buried someone in the wrong place and was sacked for the grave mistake?"

"Time to diet. Went to the neighborhood pool today and all the women dressed me with their eyes..."

"My son is a real hand full. I didn't have any tissues handy."

"Q: Why do women have tits? A: So men will talk to them."

"A game developer recently released a ""rectal prolapse simulator""... ...they called it ""Fallout""."

"Paraguay-Uraguay in the final would be so guay."

"""Dude, we should swap spacesuits. Just for a laugh."" ""Ha, yeah ok."" [swaps suits] ""Now we sh-"" ""You took a shit in this, didn't you?"""

"I met a cute deaf girl at a bar the other day... ... that bitch still hasn't returned any of my calls."