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Joke of the Day

"Where do theatrical cats wear their gloves? On their... Dramatic Paws"

"I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but fuck you."

"I met a Muslim biker once... He was the Sergeant at harams"

"Why is it called the 3/5 compromise? Because it is only 2/5 solution."

"If I'm carrying a torch for you it's only because I want to set you on fire."

"Tits are like Lego bricks. They're there for the kid, but dad ends up playing with them."

"Dress for the job you want, not the job you have. I came to work naked. I want to be a porn star. Now I'm just unemployed."

"Coin joke I walked into a music store with $50 I walked out with a Nickleback"

"What is the similarity between tight rope walking and an old lady giving you head? You don't want to look down."

"I hate it when strangers question me. I'm with my kid, & this lady goes, 'He's cute. Who does he look like?' I'm like, 'Your husband'"