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Joke of the Day

"""The greatest thing about twitter is that you can quote something & totally make up the source."" ~ Abraham Lincoln, 1862"

"What do you call a wandering caveman? A meanderthal."

"What are the cops gonna do? Unrape you?"

"How do you tittie fuck a flat chested chick? Froggy style. Ribbit ribbit"

"How did Sherlock reply to Watson's inquiry, ""Sherlock, where did you get all of these lemons?"" ""A lemon tree, my dear Watson."""

"I bet all the cool math nerds call each other algebros."

"guy A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells ""You should have been here at 8:30!"" he replies: ""Why? What happened at 8:30?"""

"Why dont blind people go skydiving? It scares the hell out of the dog."

"What were Adam's first ever words to Eve? ""Stand back - I don't know how big it's going to get!"""

"Q: Where can you find an ocean without any water? A: On a map!"