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Joke of the Day

"What were Adam's first ever words to Eve? ""Stand back - I don't know how big it's going to get!"""

"Did you hear about the tick who followed U2 on tour? They say he was living life on The Edge."

"Teacher and Student Teacher: Whoever answers my next question, can go home. One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: Who just threw that? Boy: Me and I'm going home now."

"My wife says I'm irresponsible with money! No change there then."

"I've banged a lot of hoes and I'm planning on retiring. I heard the retirement homes have good pussy."

"What's the difference between light and hard? You can sleep with the light on."

"i have learned nothing from everything and will continue to do so with zero responsibility and consequences"

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Licksalottapuss."

"Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver."

"There's no I in team But there are quite a few of them in Multiple Personality Disorder"