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Joke of the Day

"Want to know the real reason girls go to the bathroom together? The air hockey table. All our bathrooms have one."

"I was thinking about telling a Thailand joke... But Phucket."

"Just when I thought we'd avoided all controversial topics at Thanksgiving dinner my niece said Aristocats was better than The Lion King"

"Is it solipsistic in here or is it just me?"

"I used to be called the mushroom in high school Because I was a real fungi. (Don't hate me)"

"The only problem with teaching little kids to share is that sometimes they want some of my stuff"

"Why don't orphans play baseball. Because they don't know where home is."

"What's brown and sits on a piano bench? Beethoven's Last Movement."

"Sometimes pretending to be busy takes more effort than being busy."

"If you were a hot chick. You probably just hatched!"