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Joke of the Day
"Why do blondes have more fun? They're easier to find in the dark."
Next Joke
"-Are you single? -No, I'm an album."
"How many votes does it take to change a light bulb? Votes don't change shit."
"Q: Chief Running Water had two sons. What were their names? A: Hot and Cold."
"So Philip Seymour Hoffman is in the new Hunger Games . . . If anything can bring him back, it's some powerful heroine."
"What is every bodybuilder's favorite city? Gainsboro."
"Here's a pie chart on procrastination."
"Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands."
"The best thing about alcohol hand gel in hospitals isn't the hygiene, but that everyone walks around like they're hatching a dastardly plan."
"What is the thing called that irrigates your lawn? A garden Jose."