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Joke of the Day

"Why does the fat chick give the best blowjobs? She closes her eyes and imagines she's having cordon bleu."

"Me: I've had this for 3 weeks & I'm still single! HomeDepot Clerk: ma'am, a stud finder is for the beams in your wall Me: that was unclear"

"Why didn't the lawyer monkey make any money? Because he did all his work pro bonobo"

"Whenever i am lonely or depressed my piano makes me feel better... Its an appreciating asset."

"""Your word is their..."" ""Your word is their,"" said the spelling bee judge. The contestant, confused, asked for a sentence. ""They're looking for their dog over there,"" replied the judge."

"*knock knock* Go away I'm not home ""I can hear you"" I can hear you too..go away ""I brought food"" What kind of food"

"My grandfather's favorite joke Q: How do you make a Peking Duck? A: Throw a brick at him. As my grandfather would say, ""That's as funny as a crutch."""

"When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts."

"Why was the Egyptian queen so grumpy? Because, she was on her pyramid!"

"What do you call a Chinese man with a bad sense of direction? Wong Wei"