140159
Joke of the Day
"Bicycle joke Why did the guy fall off his bicycle? Because I threw a microwave at him"
Next Joke
"I was so poor, we couldn't afford a bidet. I had to do hand stands in the shower."
"Girls must gain like a 4 point bump after you've had a few drinks. Cause I'm in a bar in Greece, and these dames around me look like a 5 right now."
"Ellen Pao right now [deleted]"
"The most valuable thing you can make is a mistake- you can't learn anything from being perfect."
"The Black Death was the best disease. Any attempts to replicate it are just plague-iarism."
"JOB INTERVIEWER: it says here ur a postmodern deconstructivist...? ME: did ur parents realy name u 'Job'? especialy with a last name like urs?"
"what did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? aye matey"
"An alcoholic goes to the doctor.. The doctor diagnoses the man and says ""You have alcohol poisoning."" The man replies, ""I am going to find and KILL the person who poisoned my drinks!"""
"[playing pictionary] Her: A circle..a ring...a diamond ring...a diamond engagement ring...OMG YES I'LL MARRY YOU! Him: Its a door knocker."