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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a cow and 9/11? Americans can't milk the cow for 14 years."

"I spent all day yesterday putting my old watches together to make a belt. When I finally finished I realized it was just a huge waste of time."

"Remember when there were backyard gardens? Oh, those were good thymes."

"Want to spice things up? Look them right in the eyes and lick their fingers seductively. My dentist didn't appreciate it, but yours might."

"How do blonde braincells die? Alone. "

"A chinese father tells his 7 year old son he's adopted His son replies: it's ok daddy I learned this in school already! 2 wongs don't make a white."

"You know the Yahoo hack is not that bad... at least someone knows my password to my Yahoo account."

"Ppl who make fun of outfit repeating? I look bomb af so I'm gonna wear this again I'll even wear it to your funeral if you keep talking shit"

"What do you call a women with two brain cells? Pregnant."

"Have you heard about that new program that only the living can watch? You'd have to be dead to miss it!"