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Joke of the Day

"I actually don't really hate anybody at all except for Oprah,David spade, Kevin James, the mom from the Berenstain Bears, Sheryl Crow, Kevin"

"Rescue attempts are being made to save a bull stranded on Mt. Everest Reports confirm that the steaks have never been higher."

"Why doesn't UGA ever have a nativity scene at Christmas? Because they can't find three wise men and a virgin."

"How much does it cost for a pirate to get his ears pierced? A buck an ear."

"twitter getting rid of the 140-character limit is a bad idea. the ability to say what you need to say in as few words as possible is (1/533)"

"""Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain streaking"" [pilot darts out of the cockpit completely naked]"

"I finally told her those three magical words every woman wish to hear.. I give up!"

"Where does the red teletubby come from? Poland"

"i lost my weed in my room does anyone have a drug sniffer dog that can keep a secret"

"If I wear a wizard hat and robe to my cousin's wedding this weekend, I bet no one asks me if I'm next."