139649

Joke of the Day

"My roommate is a chemistry major, and plays the organ.. One could say that he's an organic chemist."

"I want to be a ""cool"" uncle, so I let my nephew play with all the things I wasn't allowed to when I was his age. Mostly knives and bleach."

"Does heavy lifting make you dumb? Yes Cause counting to 10 has never been this hard before"

"The McRib is back. Because you're getting new underwear for Christmas anyway."

"'Escalator' is what He-Man's enemy is called in Spain."

"Funny how you can tell a child Santa is made up and they accept it immediately, but you tell an adult God is made up, and they throw a fit."

"""Johnny Depp looks good in that outfit!"" ""That's Diane Keaton."""

"What do you call a boat whose captain has no idea what he's doing and works for free? The Internship"

"Your gene pool could use a little chlorine."

"He told me he wanted a dirty girl so I didn't shower for two weeks. Now he won't return my calls. Forget women, MEN and their mixed signals!"