139443

Joke of the Day

"I stay up at night worrying about what happens to the unquestioned Jeopardy answers."

"How do you know when you're watching too much porn? Your MILF tells you so."

"[OC] Why did the mayonnaise win the running race? Because the tomato sauce couldn't Ketchup."

"Did you hear about the cannibals who captured a scrawny old hunter? It sure gave them something to chew over."

"Samsung have done well with the Galaxy Note 7 Sales are blowing up!"

"My wife and I only smoke cigarettes after sex I've had the same pack since we were married but she's up to three packs a day! (Thanks, Rodney!)"

"A friend of mine got crushed by falling books. He only has his shelf to blame."

"Where did bob go during the explosion? ...everywhere......."

"""Hey Steve Jobs, I'm really happy for you, And I'ma let you finish, but Moses had the greatest tablet of all time!"" -Kanye"

"[airport security] *Beep* ""step through again, but don't say Beep."" *Alarm* ""Once more sir, but if u speak, I'll shoot u."" {thinks} *bzzt*"