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Joke of the Day

"Pete and Repete walk into a bar... Pete and Repete walk into a bar, Pete walks out. Who is left?"

"Twitter birth control: airfare"

"Why couldn't the artist get a driver's license? He gave off a good Impression, but couldn't make a Van Gogh."

"You can tell that a train has a gambling problem... When it spends all its time at the track."

"A young boy who has diarrhea asks his mom for some viagra... She asks him why on earth he would want that, and the boy replies, ""isn't that the stuff you give Dad when his shit isn't hard?"""

"Grandpa, why did you have so many kids? ""Hey anon, do you want to know why your grandmother and I had so many children?"" ""Why's that, Grandpa?"" ""No TV."""

"Why do they call it ""Ben Folds Five""? Because he folds five penises and puts them into little drawers!"

"Why does ACDC prefer Android to Apple? She's Got The Jack"

"When I was a kid adults would use swear words then apologise by saying 'Excuse my French'. I still remember my first day at school when the teacher asked ""Does anyone know any French?"""

"Found out the paper in my favorite jeans is made from hemp. Hashtag Hashtag"