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Joke of the Day
"A Weed Whacker is not as sexy as it sounds"
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"Only my husband would walk up to my gynecologist in Costco, point at me, give him the two thumbs up while grinning and say, 'Nice one, huh?'"
"Where do spiders play their FA Cup final ? Webley stadium !"
"Ace of Base and the Lords of Acid meet in a bar and neutralize each other"
"My wife told me to take a spider out instead of killing it We went and had drinks. Cool guy, wants to be a web developer"
"I thought the sea urchin was my friend but it was anemone."
"Mall Santa: what do you want for Christmas? Me: drugs. Mall Santa *whispers* meet me in the food court in 20 minutes."
"It seems to be true, particularly in middle America, that those most militant about using up fossil fuels, don't actually believe in fossils"
"""Honey, we're out of bootleg DVDs, and Samurai swords."" - Flea Market attendees."
"One way to find out if your crush likes you is: Who cares. People are horrible and it's better to be alone."