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Joke of the Day

"What's the last thing you want to hear when you're blowing Willie Nelson? ""I'm not Willie Nelson."""

"Help is a magic word. Say it to people & watch them disappearing from the horizon of your life."

"If there's two things I hate, it's racist people and niggers."

"if you added the letters S and E to the X files it would be the X-ES Files. haha excess files. way too many files lol"

"Why do women sound like they're having an orgasm when they play tennis? And why does my mother play Tennis in her bedroom?"

"A priest, a little boy, a Rabbi and an imam get into a cute little Nissan car. The little boy says... ... what is this, a Juke?"

"What animal is best at playing hide and seek? The airplane."

"It's so humid today I keep expecting a southern lawyer to do his closing argument."

"Capital letters... ...the difference between using chemicals to remove polish, and using chemicals to remove Polish."

"Pee your name in the snow and you'll quickly understand why they teach cursive in our schools."