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Joke of the Day

"Teacher : In the exam you will be allowed 30 minutes for each question. Pupil : How long for the answer sir !"

"Two snowmen are standing next to each other in a field when one looks over to the other and asks: ""Do you smell carrots?"""

"What do I want to do to your body? I don't know. Identify it, I guess."

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered her today to place bets on how long this marriage will last because these idiots met 2 months ago."

"Knock Knock *Who's there *The Kgb *The kgb who? *(Slaps person) we will ask the questions."

"British police don't carry guns. So what exactly do they do then? Yell ""STOP... OR I'LL SAY STOP AGAIN!"""

"How do you know Justin Bieber is Canadian? Only a Canadian could get a #1 on Billboard with a song called Sorry."

"What do you get when water washes away dirt? a road"

"Why did the lonely man work on his days off? (X-post /r/dadjokes) He loved the company."

"Mom: you failed your english test, didn't you? Me: who telled you?"