200869

Joke of the Day

"British police don't carry guns. So what exactly do they do then? Yell ""STOP... OR I'LL SAY STOP AGAIN!"""

"I spilled a whole case of forks today..... ...you could say I forked up real bad"

"Mickey and Minnie go to get divorced... When the judge asks for the reason, Mickey: ""Because my wife is fucking goofy."" Judge: ""You mean she's crazy?"" Mickey: ""No, she's just fucking goofy!"""

"What's the difference between a beaver and a deer? The deer has a bigger beaver"

"Fred: Thank you so much for lending me that money. I shall be everlastingly in your debt. Harry: That's what I'm afraid of!"

"A woman walks into a bar and orders a drink called ""Innuendo"". So the barkeeper gives it to her."

"[during sex] HER: this isn't working out ME: *putting sock puppet away* was it something he said?"

"What do you call a jew who works at a brewery? A he brew."

"Who sang at the funeral of those who died in a railroads arson? Adele. Some one set fire to the train"

"Did you hear about the worlds greatest magician? He was walking down the street and turned into a drug store"