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Joke of the Day

"I went to see an inflatable marching band I was excited at first, but when I got there they turned out to be pretty flat...."

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"My wife likes to talk on the phone when she's having sex. The other day, she called me from a hotel."
"Steve Irwin died as he lived With animals in his heart."
"What do you call a dog magician? A Labracadrabador"
"""You home?"" -scariest text you can get"
"A woman walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre So he gives her one."
"Doctor! Is it normal to have one leg longer than the other two?"
"What's all white and can't fly? Harrison Ford"
"Rumour has it that I got a new computer today... It's Adele!"
"What do you call a snobby criminal going down the stairs? A condescending con descending."