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Joke of the Day

"A human fart can be louder than a trombone. I discovered that at my daughter's school concert."

"Did you hear? Broadway is making a theatrical production on puns! It's going to be a *huge* play on words!"

"A guy walks into a bar with a gun he says ""Which one of you bastards fucked my wife?"" and a small voice from the back of the room says ""You haven't got enough bullets"""

"What kinds of vegetables did Ghandi prefer? Peace and carrots... Thought this up at work today. I'm sure it's been done before but it made me chuckle..."

"Whats the worst thing you can do to a blind man? Leave the plunger in the toilet"

"The most offensive joke I know. Why do pharmacists put cotton wool balls in all of their drug bottles? To Remind black people that they were cotton pickers before they were junkies."

"Fact: 9/10 people enjoy date rape"

"Sex Is Like A Restaurant Sometimes You Get Good Service, Sometimes Bad Service, Sometimes No Service, And Sometimes You Have To Be Happy With Self-Service"

"When Gwen Stefani goes to Hawaii I bet she aint no mahaloback girl either."

"If your human doesn't feed you immediately, run in front of their feet and trip them up. ~Cats, apparently."