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Joke of the Day

"If your human doesn't feed you immediately, run in front of their feet and trip them up. ~Cats, apparently."

"Ask someone how they're doing & they'll say fine. Share with them a random health issue & wait for the 20 min dissertation on their ailment."

"Two white guys and two black guys go into a police station The white guys come back from the station"

"What does it take to claim the world record for 'most blowjobs in one hour? You need to be able to blow a lot of guys in quick suck session. ^^^yeah ^^^I ^^^know ^^^it's ^^^lame"

"Following the recent anti-Islam film made, there will be a film made to mock Jesus Christ. It will be released in 1979 and will be called Life of Brian"

"Little kids are so lucky; they don't have to pay rent or wear deodorant."

"Chilly Did you know that you can freeze a human to -273.15 C and he'd be 0K"

"Next time someone catches you talking to yourself, make it worthwhile by laughing, yelling ""Good one!"" and high-fiving the air."

"Why do golfers wear 2 pairs of pants? Incase he gets a hole in one"

"What did Thor say to the weaver fixing his cape? What are your Hemsworth?"