187977

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear? Broadway is making a theatrical production on puns! It's going to be a *huge* play on words!"

Next Joke
 
"I used to be schizophrenic but I'm OK now. No I'm not."
"What starts with ""F"" and ends with ""uck""? Fuck."
"got kicked out of cub scouts as a kid... for eating a brownie..."
"Going through the dealership lot with the salesman, pointing at every car and asking, ""what kinda robot does that one turn into?"""
"No LinkedIn, I do not want to display my Twitter on my profile. I would actually like to keep my chances of getting a job above zero."
"lovely joke Girl: You would be a good dancer except for two things. Boy: What are the two things? Girl: Your feet."
"Today, I saw that my ironing board cover was wrinkled.I laughed at the irony.Then I laughed again because irony has the word iron in it."
"What bathroom does Roy G. Biv use? The colored one."
"Guy: ""Do you have a lighter?"" Me: ""Yep"" Guy: ""You smoke?"" Me: ""No, you just never know when you're gonna need to light someone on fire."""