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Joke of the Day

"There once was a soldier named Private Acid HQ called him back. When he got to home base, he was found neutralized."

"i just realized there are more toes in the world than people"

"ME: Jesus Christ, this is the slowest train I've ever travelled on BRIDE: Someone please get this prick off my dress"

"""Body of Christ."" ""Why thank you, I HAVE been working out."""

"What's the best part of being a lesbian in 1912? Both got seats on the titanic's lifeboats."

"What do you call a cross between a hippo, an elephant and a rhino? Hell if I know"

"What do you call a woman who fell off a cliff? Eileen Dover..."

"Based on my hair this morning . I think I might be a muppet ."

"Have you heard about the new club with the gloryholes? It's just a little hole in the wall."

"What did the nurse who knocked on the pregnant lady's door say? Womb Service!"