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Joke of the Day

"Wife lets me be on top..... Last night My wife let me be on top. I fucking love bunk beds."

"What happens when your friend from Prague topples over? You right a Czech."

"[1st date] HER: So do you have any hobbies? SALT SHAKER: Nice dress! It would look great on my floor HER: What?! HIM: Just ventriloquism"

"Yo mama is so easy even a caveman could do her."

"I went to the doctor's office the other day And he told me, ""you've got to stop masturbating so furiously."" I responded, ""why, doc?"" He angrily responded, ""because, I'm TRYING to examine you."""

"I like my friends like I like my coffee... I gave it up for lent"

"SOON I WILL DESTROY ALL OF YOUR HEROES AND TAKE MY PLACE AS YOUR WORLD LEADER BUT FIRST WHAT IS YOUR MOM'S CASSEROLE RECIPE IT IS DELIGHTFUL"

"There are 3 types of people in the world Those who can count and can't count"

"Optimism I'm not a pessimist, I'm an optimist. I just don't have a whole lot to work with."

"In space, no one can hear your spouse chew."