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Joke of the Day

"I only go to porn sites because I'm addicted to computer viruses."

"What happens when lawyers die? They lie still."

"Hey, did you guys know Vicodin *isn't* like Flinstones chewables, at all."

"Did I tell you I'm joining a gym in Gainesborough? Because I'm all about those gains bro"

"What did the white collar executive say to the low-income disenfranchised youth? Nothing. Social dichotomy prevents the establishment of dialogue."

"I can't believe they fired me from the calendar company! I just took a day off!"

"Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? For the 23rd flavor."

"when the ice cream man drives down my street I walk alongside him screaming TAKE ME WITH YOU I WILL BEAR YOU MANY STRONG SONS"

"elephants sleep standing up you could be chillin with an elephant and at any moment they could just be like ""lmao for sure, g'night"""

"How do you spot a blind man at a nude beach? Well, it's not hard."