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Joke of the Day
"Mules... are SO half-assed."
Next Joke
"Where do you find 100 fat cows? At bingo"
"RT = Retweet. PR = Paraphrased tweet. MR = Mangled tweet. Please know which one you are doing and use accordingly."
"You know how in restaurants they often ask you if you prefer bottled water or tap water? In Flint, the waiter asks you, ""Regular or Unleaded?"""
"I may not be the best looking, wittiest, smartest or even the most successful person. I forget where I was going with this..."
"""Honey, you're not really nice to your son"" ""Which one do you mean? Steve, John or the fat one?"""
"If someone on your bus says ""my butthole is 28"", what do you think that means, exactly?"
"""let's put computers and keyboards in our cars. now let's go catch all the people typing on tiny keyboards in their cars"" - cops"
"My tribal name is sleeps in the river... I was a bed-wetter"
"What's the worst prank you can play on a blind person? Leave the plunger in the toilet"