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Joke of the Day

"I just found out I'm going to be a father!!! My wife will be pretty mad when she finds out."

"I signed up for some Meteorology courses. MET 104 Standing in Deep Water MET 105 Standing in Heavy Rain MET 106 Acting Amazed"

"Why was Joan of Arc never good in debates? Because she could not take the heat."

"I joined a 12 step program for people who talk too much. Its called OnAndOnAnon"

"Taking my wife to a wife swapping party tonight... Hoping to get a PS4 in return."

"What to hear a joke? A girlfriend.. While the humor is dry, in this joke i fully understand that this is not something many of you will ever get."

"*writes employment history on arm *writes professional references on thigh *writes email address on neck *adds ""resume"" to resume"

"Don't play with a girl's heart she only has one play with her tits, she has two of those."

"My girlfriend has twelve breasts. It seems kind of freaky, dozen-tit?"

"Used to be that multiple communication devices meant you're a drug dealer, now I'm not sure which of these toddlers to buy from at the park."