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Joke of the Day

"I got a call today from a distorted voice saying ""Five grand in cash, or we kill your wife"" Both options were tempting, but I decided to take the money."

Next Joke
 
"What do you call breads ability to smell? ... Naan sense!"
"So, my girlfriend won't let me wear my mood ring anymore... ...I'm not really sure how I feel about it"
"I'm drafting a plan to make more guy friends. So far all I have is ""Don't say ""super"" as often"" and ""Talk about beards."" I'm super jazzed."
"What do you call a communist pirate? Lutin."
"I dressed up as an enema for Halloween It really scares the crap out of people."
"Me: ""Goodnight Bed."" Bed: ""New foam who dis?"""
"If a quiz is quizicle, what's a test?"
"What kind of cereal do you find in a haunted house? Cinnamon Ghost Crunch"
"A girl melon... ...is in love with a boy melon. When her father finds out they want to get married he tells her ""I'm sorry honey, but you cantaloupe"""