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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I've never paid 200 dollars to have a garbanzo bean on my chest."

"I lost my mood ring. I'm not sure how I feel about this."

"Chuck Norris was the orginal sculptor of Mount Rushmore. He completed the entire project using only a bottle opener and a drywall trowel."

"My grandmother used to wakeup and head for the bathroom . along the wat she would say with a raised voice 'o Jesus christ' Soon after my grandfather passed away she asked me to move the coffee table"

"""Oh you like this cake? (*Tosses cake out the window*) Oops."" - Game of Thrones"

"It seems like I only lose weight when I don't buy ice cream. Can someone else start buying my ice cream for me please?"

"One day you'll find someone who loves you for you. Someone with low, low, super way low standards. Lower than what you're thinking right now"

"Cool name for god = ""head writer of The Weather Channel"""

"Now working on my 2nd million. I gave up on the first."

"What do you call a hispanic gas? Cabron Dioxide!"