4285

Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris was the orginal sculptor of Mount Rushmore. He completed the entire project using only a bottle opener and a drywall trowel."

"What do you call a small dog? A subwoofer!"

"Childhood obesity is on the rise and so is underage sex.. What I want to know is who's fucking all these fat kids."

"I'm basically Switzerland. I'm cold and you have to get really high in order to truly appreciate my beauty."

"The Grim Reaper walks over to you in his Uggs, taps his Michael Kors watch and says, ""you're literally dead."""

"What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts that a 25 year old doesn't? her bellybutton."

"Whats brown and sticky? a stick"

"I want to be a host at a restaurant so if someone asks for a booth I can yell, ""YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE BOOTH!"""

"According to the principle of the sandwich, if you put butter on both sides the sandwich will hang in the air."

"The Arrogance of Authority A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas , and talked with an old rancher"