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Joke of the Day
"People say I am condescending. THAT MEANS I TALK DOWN TO PEOPLE."
Next Joke
"What do you call someone incapable of eating people? A can't-ibal"
"Being an adult is like being a Quentin Tarantino movie: it starts out real cool, there's lots of cursing, it's very confusing, everyone dies"
"The Sun is similar to Beer Sun rises in the east and sets in the west. Beer rises in yeast and sets in the waist ."
"thesaurus had the greatest vocabulary of all the dinosaurs"
"Six inches of snow predicted tonight: Is that twitter 6"" | | Subway 6"" | | Real life 6"" | | Or Dan 6"" | | Cheesecake"
"Friend: How's the wine? Me: It's exCHARDONNARY Friend: *taking my glass away* No."
"What's the difference between Pizza and your opinion? I asked for Pizza #KingOfjokes"
"Schrodinger's Cat is depressed Cat: No one came to my birthday party/funeral"
"What did the prairie dog say to the the coyote?"