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Joke of the Day
"What's the best way to get a redditors attention?"
Next Joke
"My friend likes to read philosophy instead of going to the club to pick up chicks... One could say he puts Decartes before the whores"
"I only shave on days when I'll be having sex. I live life as a yeti now."
"Sure, I have gluten free Halloween candy for your kid. *Reaches in pocket & pulls out middle finger* Get off my lawn before I call the cops"
"My Grandfather has the heart of a lion! And a ban from the cincinnati zoo"
"Autocorrect turned your lynch mob into a lunch mob? Maybe if you ate something you wouldn't be so angry."
"Son: Dad, you work so hard and never get any credit. You're like a superhero! Dad: Nice try. You're still not getting the Internet password."
"What's the difference between an elevator and a black guy? The elevator can raise a child."
"Never mind money, jobs, and real estate...I wonder what the youngs will do to us when they realize we've taken all the good usernames?"
"How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None!"